Yo.  Haven’t been on in a while and I apologize for that.  Initially, you could attribute my absence to me being sad about my job and not particularly wanting to drag the supposed entertainment factor of this thing down with my general life malaise.  You could probably throw a little bit of laziness, a dash of ‘where did that witty comment I had earlier go?’ and a post-collegiate identity crisis (which is far from over.)

I’m not a toll collector anymore.   I haven’t been for a few months now.  Don’t worry, I didn’t finally lose my shit and throw my ever-growing stack of dollar coins at some jerk’s face.  I got a job.  Imagine that.  Called on a Friday, picked up my life, moved eight hours away and started on the following Monday.  Having spent a year out of college in this dead-end job, I felt that a lot my older co-workers had kind of given up on me.  They always were so encouraging when I was in school, and interested to hear my big plans about moving away and making it big.  And then nothing happened.  They were still just as accepting as always, but you could tell they were a little disappointed.  Another kid destined to end up just like them, wondering about how things might have gone.  The ones with degrees who had the misfortune of graduating during the Carter years and ‘lucking’ into this profession shook their heads at my frustration, partly in empathy, partly in bitterness.

And then I got a shot.  And that’s all it is.  One shot.  Sink or swim.  Nothing assured.  No comfort zone.  You suck, you go home.  No pressure, kid. But that’s my own issue.

The warmth I experienced in my last two days was completely unexpected.  I had no idea I had so many friends.  So many well-wishers, so many hugs. (Yeah, toll collectors hug too)  I feel like I’m carrying a little piece of these people with me.  The ones who had a kid(or two.)  The ones who never went away.  The ones who did and came back.  The ones just biding their time, waiting for their own moment.  I love them all, some much more than others.  And in their own ways, they have all pushed me to this.  Whether they ever even did anything at all.  My success (or failure) is my own, but I will always carry them with me and my time with them will serve as the greatest motivation of all.

So while I could pull a President Madagascar and ‘SHUT. DOWN.  EVERYTHING.” I don’t quite feel like I’m done here.  That being said, I’m not exactly sure where to take this.  It’s not as if I updated frequently back when I was collecting tolls, so I can’t say there’s much on the horizon.  Should I write about the plight of the civil servant?  The trials and tribulations of the service industry?   Customer service horror stories?  Life after toll collection?  Honestly, who knows..

But I do think I have a slightly different perspective on things.   Maybe that’s why I give the security guards a big ‘good morning’ on the way in and a simple ‘have a good night’ when I leave.  Nothing holier-than-thou.  I don’t do it out of guilt.  I’m not afraid they’ll commit suicide if I don’t squeeze out eight words.  Bay day?  Good day?  Whatever.  It’s just the right thing to do.

No big revelations here.  Just be decent.  And always treat your bartender well.

BTW, I’ve never actually introduced myself.  Name’s Vincent.  Nice to meet you guys.  We’ll talk soon.

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